Twenty-One and Twenty-Twelve
A note to past self, present self and future self:
The year of the twenties. I am twenty-one…and now begins 2012.
Turning 21 was certainly a climatic event in my life six months ago, but what lies ahead in the next six months is an uphill trek to my dream of the “real world” and it will be an exciting, nerve-wrecking roller coaster ride. A ride where I will never know when the next loop or fall will be.
Reflecting back on the past six months, beginning from the moment I metamorphosed into 21, I certainly enjoyed the excitement of finally being of legal drinking and gambling age, but it was also filled with months of lessons learned. I definitely saw myself toughen up in particular roles and situations. I felt independence flowing inside of me. And, my vision for what I want in life has also reshaped and stemmed. I thought I wanted something, but I learned that my true passion lies within its vicinity, but still elsewhere. I would not have realized this if I did not test myself this past semester.
And, that is why the journey is so important. These next six months will be the biggest deal-breakers. If I work hard, I will get what I want. Surely the endpoint I want is pivotal, but I cannot forget the adventure. Focus on the journey, not the destination. You see, sometimes people get lost in the moment and forget the whole point of living life. They let worries enter the big picture and stress out at the little things. But, what they cannot forget is to not let every mishap hold them back. Let it happen, learn from it and move forward into what is better. Tomorrow will always be another chance to do bigger and be better.
I have feared so much growing up, but every fear only pushed myself towards something greater. This is not to say I no longer fear…heck I am still afraid of plenty, but I have come to realize that not being perfect was the best part of growing up. I learned that all the times I did not do my best on a test, and needed my parent’s signature, was not the end of the world in grade school. That 60 I got on a science test in junior high school didn’t affect where I ended up in high school. It made me realize that science is just not my forte. Going to a really small high school did not prevent me from attending a great school like Fordham. Having to take theology for the Fordham core sucked at the time because it definitely pulled down my GPA, but nonetheless I did learn something from that class. I learned that theology is not my forte and it further reassured that I was going down the right path for me! I love writing and I enjoy being visually creative. But, just one more mishap is another lesson you learn. Not getting that ABC internship was devastating for me, but not the end of the world. I definitely landed CBS and now I have a range of opportunities that I cannot let fly by.
Those were all times of panic and fear, but it really was all meant to happen so that I could learn from them. When one door closes, another one definitely opens. You just have to stay positive. You just need to be prepared. Definitely do not limit yourself with a one-way dead end. Always create options for yourself. Remember who you are now, and what you want to be. Push yourself, test yourself and do not let fear stop you from being awesome.
I feared becoming news editor of the school newspaper, but I survived this semester. I feared the responsibilities of that position and I feared not being able to handle it, but I made it through in the fall and gained a package full of experience I will never forget. I was able to be a part of online video pieces, and finally be on-camera. Surely, I cringed at these amateur videos, but each piece has been better than the one before. And, I know I will make even better pieces this coming semester.
In just a few days, my last semester of college…EVER…will begin. My awesome second internship with CBS will start. My life will depend on these last few months and my future self will once again reflect back on my past self. Hopefully it will be with pride.
You never know what is waiting around the corner for you, but no one ever knows. But in order to build character and be ready to face the “real world,” you really need to not let that fear hold you back.
I only have five months left of college. I will enjoy my final days as a senior with the people that appreciate me, guide me and influence me to be a better Laura. I will make decisions that I will praise and not regret.
So I part with these words, that someone wise once said, and it is DEFINITELY not from the Pokemon movie theme song. There are only two mistakes one can make…not going all the way and not starting.
But, this is something that I will say. (I hope I can proudly say that I came up with it because I even Googled it in direct quotes to make sure no one else has said it before)
Conquer your fear, and you will persevere.
Love Always,
LC <3
